Friends
Friends have been a very important part of my life ever since I was enlisted into SAF. Yes, it took me 18 long years to realise the importance of friends. Friends are the people that you may need to depend heavily upon when you step out of your home. They are also the people you turn to when you can't rely on your family.
Many of my friends have remarked, some time or another, that I have an exceptionally wide social circle in NUS. The cirlce doesn't just consist of my former school mates and the company mates I had during NS. In fact, about 50% of them were made after I entered NUS. These people are actually my friends' OG friends, former school mate, camp mates, etc.
I was often asked, "How do you make friends so easily?". To that, I return this question, "What's so difficult about making friends?" The only difficulty I find, is the very first step of starting a conversation. Subsequently, all you have to do is to keep in touch and that's about it. After a certain period of time, if you find that the other party is someone you can get along with pretty well, you'll hang out more with him or her and become closer friends.
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I got to know 'A' and 'B' during year 1 because they were from my friend's OG group, and we were in the same lecture group. They were part of a rather close knit sub-group within their OG, primarily because they were also in the same lecture group. I managed to blend in with their little gang easily because they were all rather friendly.
We used to hang out quite a lot during year 1, since our time tables were quite similar. We would always celebrate one another's birthday by secretly buying presents and planning surprises and such. However, B's attendance for our outings gradually decreased. Everyone has their own commitments, and I suppose B has other friends she needs to spend time with. This naturally put the rest of B's gang off. By year 2, most of them were already not expecting B to turn up for outings at all. Most of all, A was very displeased with her.
We're all in our final year now. Things, if they have changed, have only changed for the worse. A's birthday is coming soon, and we were trying to find a day when everyone in the gang could meet up for a celebration outing. As A's birthday came very soon after the exams, we decided to have a belated celebration. B has a camp on the week right after A's birthday, while the rest of the gang were able to make it. I decided to push the celebration day back to accomodate B.
In the midst of discussing when to have the outing, I heard that A don't care if B is included in the outing anymore.
"Her presence does not make a difference to me.", says A. These words really caused a great sadness to overwhelm to me. To me, B is someone who doesn't really know how to show her appreciation for friends. At least not to this gang. It doesn't mean she does not appreciate us. Then again, I'm not too sure if my view of B is correct. Whatever the case, I still feel that there's no need to condemn B to the extent of finding B's presence as unnecessary.
Why choose to hate and live in bitterness, when you can forgive and live in contentment?
- Tengkia
Many of my friends have remarked, some time or another, that I have an exceptionally wide social circle in NUS. The cirlce doesn't just consist of my former school mates and the company mates I had during NS. In fact, about 50% of them were made after I entered NUS. These people are actually my friends' OG friends, former school mate, camp mates, etc.
I was often asked, "How do you make friends so easily?". To that, I return this question, "What's so difficult about making friends?" The only difficulty I find, is the very first step of starting a conversation. Subsequently, all you have to do is to keep in touch and that's about it. After a certain period of time, if you find that the other party is someone you can get along with pretty well, you'll hang out more with him or her and become closer friends.
------------------------------------------------------------------
I got to know 'A' and 'B' during year 1 because they were from my friend's OG group, and we were in the same lecture group. They were part of a rather close knit sub-group within their OG, primarily because they were also in the same lecture group. I managed to blend in with their little gang easily because they were all rather friendly.
We used to hang out quite a lot during year 1, since our time tables were quite similar. We would always celebrate one another's birthday by secretly buying presents and planning surprises and such. However, B's attendance for our outings gradually decreased. Everyone has their own commitments, and I suppose B has other friends she needs to spend time with. This naturally put the rest of B's gang off. By year 2, most of them were already not expecting B to turn up for outings at all. Most of all, A was very displeased with her.
We're all in our final year now. Things, if they have changed, have only changed for the worse. A's birthday is coming soon, and we were trying to find a day when everyone in the gang could meet up for a celebration outing. As A's birthday came very soon after the exams, we decided to have a belated celebration. B has a camp on the week right after A's birthday, while the rest of the gang were able to make it. I decided to push the celebration day back to accomodate B.
In the midst of discussing when to have the outing, I heard that A don't care if B is included in the outing anymore.
"Her presence does not make a difference to me.", says A. These words really caused a great sadness to overwhelm to me. To me, B is someone who doesn't really know how to show her appreciation for friends. At least not to this gang. It doesn't mean she does not appreciate us. Then again, I'm not too sure if my view of B is correct. Whatever the case, I still feel that there's no need to condemn B to the extent of finding B's presence as unnecessary.
Why choose to hate and live in bitterness, when you can forgive and live in contentment?
- Tengkia
posted by Tengkia | 11:35 am
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Level of response: 3
Level of response: 3
As the saying goes, "one hand cannot clap soundly.." I guess friendship or any relationships need both parties to put in effort to maintain..
I get p***ed off too when one of my old friends keeps on churning out silly excuses to avoid outings... maybe I cared about about her presence that's why it irritates me when she doesnt put in the least effort to try to turn up for juz one outing.. I guess that's how A may be feeling bah...
On the other hand, I do not go for outings if I do not feel comfortable with the company.. that's why we've gotta reflect.. maybe it's the group that's making the person uncomfortable? hmm...
*brain dead*
B wasn't churning out silly excuses.....but she churns out a lot of last minute excuse though. And as far as I know, B does not feel uncomfortable when she hangs out with us. Maybe I wasn't sensitive enough.
I'm just very sad that things have to end up this way.
*pat pat* dun be too sad over it yeah... some things are juz not meant to be...
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